The most important quality that shapes your experience with a girl will be her self-esteem level. Confident girl: More like a guy in how she approaches the game with her intense use of logic. Needy girl: Busts out with the first “I love you” without thinking it through. Confident girl: Wants you to go out of her way to please her. A desperate girl is more like a stalker, a girl who calls you several times in a row when you don’t answer or who says things like, “What, you don’t like me anymore?
I want to focus on the two extremes, of girls who are very needy or very confident. Needy girl: Emotional, “weak.” Confident girl: Aloof, hard to read, though she may slip while intoxicated. Confident girl: Pings you via email, sometimes text. Needy girl: In a constant state of apprehension about how you feel or think about her. Confident girl: Does a cost-benefit analysis before saying it. ” Or you go on one date with her and she wants to bring you home to meet the parents, already plotting out the future.
Translation: the varying degrees to which different women are needy. Do you require constant reassurance due to low self-esteem?
I’d always known needy women appeared unattractive and weak to men, and have written a few times on how not to appear needy in a relationship. My advice is to first figure out your attachment style. Once you understand your attachment style and your needs that flow from it, the best thing to do is to find a man with similar needs – someone with a similar attachment style to yours who will not perceive you as needy.
What’s worse, it can suddenly grip us from time to time in certain contexts, even if it’s not a constant characteristic, which is part of why feelings of neediness can be so scary, difficult and unpredictable to manage.
Let’s just say that, after having read the article, I now understand that getting into a relationship with a needy woman is a man’s worst nightmare. Men are much better at hiding their neediness than women.In the United States, it’s hard to find beautiful girls that are needy, but this isn’t the case in other cultures such as Brazil and Colombia, where besides for upper-class girls, you often have a pick between needy and desperate only.Some guys come to The Art of Charm knowing they’re needy. In fact, I’d say most men who are being needy in a relationship (or in general) don’t know they’re being needy — or how they’re needy, which can be even trickier to spot.” On the other hand, let’s say that you graciously receive his compliments and show enthusiastic appreciation for the big and little things he does for you. You are confident in who you are, what you want, and how to get it. So here’s some homework to help you decide where you stand with this. Maybe you occasionally ask for his advice and let him open the pickle jar. Look back on previous relationships (short or long) and answer these questions: If you are surrounded by buddies…if men only want to use you or take from you, or you’re completely man-less…listen up! Have you had the experience of always being the giver?