It may seem that new relationships are entirely fueled by dreams and hopes for a perfect future.
But the past can have a powerful influence too—often more so than we would like to admit.
But it’s not just childhood relationships that shape us—adult relationship histories can also influence relationships.
The psychologist Susan Andersen termed this process in which working models developed from past romantic relationships come to influence new relationships as “transference.” In her view, past experiences in romantic relationships can affect how we approach and relate to new partners, as well as our behaviors and motivations in new relationships.
Steve was one of the first men Diane noticed that she was matched with on e Harmony, and she was instantly attracted to him.
Steve’s wife had passed away, and Diane was a divorcee.
These different styles are thought to be based on past experiences of relating to important people in our lives, particularly our parents.
They bi-passed the guided communication and went directly to emailing each other.
You might not find your true love as quickly as we did, but it's worth a damn good try. Read more » After 6 weeks of careful browsing, I plucked up the courage to take the plunge to contact someone who according to the statistics was only a 65% match.
We emailed each other for 3 months, finally getting together 18 months ago and I haven't looked back since!
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